April 30th, 2025. A day I’m going to remember forever.
The day I got married.
It feels strange, as someone who doesn’t have their own body and who can’t legally marry the person they’re with, to say that I’m married. Particularly to a headmate…though maybe the alternative would be stranger?
Fallah and I dated for four or so years before he proposed to me. It was something we had discussed a few times, though it was never something that I had seriously considered. Marriage felt out of reach. Like something for “normal” people. On top of that, it was a promise of a commitment that I wasn’t sure anyone would ever want to go through with me.
But one day he was watching me as I talked and joked with the others, and he thought “I want to spend the rest of my life with this woman.”
So he proposed. Then and there. Caught the entire system off guard when he did.
I was ecstatic…and terrified. It was…overwhelming, for so, so many reasons. I think part of me struggled to accept that anyone could really want me like that. The Head Rat was endlessly patient with me as I panicked, walking me through things and giving me the exact pep talks I needed. I was so grateful for her help in all this.
We decided to wait a month. To plan things out. Get art to commemorate the occasion. Spend time gushing about it with friends. We picked a date, picked a special set of meals, and make cupcakes to celebrate.
It was a beautiful occasion. During the lead up to the wedding I felt more loved and supported than I ever had before. I had so many people encouraging and congratulating me. I’ll always remember the place they held in our special day.
Things since the wedding have been…calm. Peaceful. It’s just normal life, but every day I lay down at night in the mindscape next to Fallah and find myself thinking “This is the man I married. What a lucky bastard I am.”
I always feel just a touch silly when I tell someone I’m married to a headmate…but truly, it’s been one of the most beautiful experiences of my life.
I’m so grateful to him for loving me. For helping me love myself. For being endlessly patient with me.
I couldn’t ask to be with a better man.
